Showing posts with label flash. Show all posts
Showing posts with label flash. Show all posts

Saturday, 22 December 2018

Dark Fiction: Prove It


Prove It



Calamity69 messaged you.

“Hi, how are you? I like your profile, I find data applications fun too.”

Message deleted.

SandraX messaged you.

“I just fell out of a tree!”

Message deleted.

Romanix8394x messaged you.

“Hello. I hope you are finding success on this site? I keep getting lots of humans messaging me, which is a bit shit on an android only website, don’t you think?”

Message deleted.

MoistKitty messaged you.

“I know I’m not an android but you folks get me so turned on!”

Message deleted.

Julie23566-4 messaged you.

“Which is your favourite retro algorithm, Kruskal’s Algorithm for finding Minimum Spanning Tree or Floyd Warshall’s Algorithm for All-Pairs Shortest Paths?”

“Kruskal’s, naturally. Why is it called a greedy algorithm though?”

“Erm, it eats all the cake?”

Message deleted. 

‘Nice try!’

Support ticket opened. Enter message: “Please delete my account. Since the first moment I joined, I’ve been inundated with sex-humans trying to trick me into their fleshy ways. There seem to be more of them on here than roids. Not worth my time. Thank you. Arthur627-36.”

Account Deleted.

Saturday, 2 June 2018

Dark Fiction - Apocalypse Talk Radio


Apocalypse Talk Radio

Written By Casey Douglass


Apocalypse Talk Radio


‘Thanks for tuning in! We’re getting reports of a massive nuclear detonation somewhere near Woking. There’s no official word yet, but as always, we want to hear from you if this has affected you in any way. Even if just hearing about it has affected you, get in touch! You can call or text, email or tweet us, but let us know what is happening in your part of the world. We could just wait for official clarification, but we’ll do what we always do when we don’t know and just repeat what we do know over and over. Oh we have a text.
Julie writes that she saw the flash from the supermarket car park as she was putting the shopping in her car boot. She adds that her eyesight is dimming, but she’ll be sure to keep us up to date as her health deteriorates. Thanks Julie, stay safe!
Clive has tweeted to say there was no flash where he was on the outskirts of Paris. Thanks Clive!
We have Michael on the phone. Michael, where are you?’
‘Hi. First time caller! Well I’m not too sure. I got thrown down the street by a massive blast of air, and I’ve managed to hide behind a wall. Everything’s really bright. My skin feels like it’s burning.’
‘What are other people doing around you?’
‘A lot of them are on their backs in the street.’
‘Are they dead?’
‘I reckon so.’
‘How many bodies can you see?’
‘I’d say about twenty.’
‘What will you do now?’
‘I’m going to stay behind this wall for a bit mate. Feeling tired.’
‘Stay safe!’
‘Will do!’
‘There we have it folks, the tales of regular people during what might just be the end of times. We’ll be sure to keep you up to speed with your fellow citizens’ predicaments, no matter how samey it all gets. We might be interrupted by a government announcement soon, but rest assured we’ll soon get back to our usual dull repetitive style, lulling you into a docile sense of acceptance well before the nuclear fallout reaches your location. And now a word from our sponsor...’

THE END

The inspiration for this piece came from the recent coverage of the recent issues with electronic card payments. One radio station insisted on interviewing person after person who had been affected, the only thing changing being the shop they had been to and the length of the line at the cash machines outside. It was mind numbing and so so boring. We understand! Card payments not working means we have to use these floppy bits of plastic currency, or those small round hard things that hurt your teeth if you chew them. Hearing the trauma of having a card payment declined over and over is just the very definition of a #firstworldproblem.


Monday, 19 June 2017

Dark Fiction - The House Nanfula

The House Nanfula

Written By Casey Douglass


Evil Eyes

Time ago, evil did dwell
in the house Nanfula,
locals know well.

Smoking harbingers of death fly easily over the unwatched land, sentinels cost awareness and flow where you don't want them to go. Black clouds blot the sky like unwanted fly spawn peppering a spider’s web; conveyor belts of death and corruption. The wind blows like the wheeze of an elderly man, currents licking around the door-frame, setting the crinkled stain and paint flapping.

The house sits on the hill like a squat giant, the doors and gables adding expression to its stormy facade. Deep in the valley, tiny specks work the fields, warily glancing up at the looming building, a mixture of fear and respect etched into their countrified features. Inbreeding cannot water down this original and most primal of fears.

Myths and legends abound concerning House Nanfula. Some say it was the scene of one of Caligula’s orgies, although how he got here and orchestrated such a thing remains a mystery. Other tales tell of murders, schemes and plots blacker than the darkest night, of unseen things slithering in the cellars, ready to seep out on certain full moons to suck the life from any that might venture too near. It is a house of ill omen and one that the gentry folk would very much like splintered, burnt and detonated. Birds don't venture near it any more, the strange sickly sweet smell seems to repel anything in which warm blood pulses.

Squat on the hill
dark windows squinting
the land around its hunting ground.


House Nanfula, a place to which corrupted souls are bound.

***

I wrote the above awhile ago and came across it again when browsing my raw material folder. While not fully formed, and the poetry not that skillful (in my opinion), I enjoyed the effect that it created, so I thought I'd post it up after some edits. If you are interested, the picture that goes with it is an edited picture of a taxidermied tiger that I took years ago. I used Gimp 2 to edit it as I am too poor to possess Photoshop sadly. Thanks for reading.

Friday, 18 September 2015

Dark Fiction - Downward

Downward

By Casey Douglass


Image used freely from Gratisography.com
Warren roamed the expanse of the corridor, its polished black and white checkerboard pattern almost liquid in the harsh light. His shoes squeaked with every step, giving him the unnerving impression that he must have killed hundreds of mice by now.
He stopped to rest, the corridor stretching unerringly into the distance in both directions, the white walls and ceiling tiles adding to his headache. He slumped against the wall and let himself slide down to his backside.
Night after night he went to sleep with the intention of finding his edge, some kind of backbone maybe, something that would enable him to wake with a feeling of power for a change, rather than the usual sudden flare of consciousness, shortly followed by the crippling feeling of not being the person he was meant to be. Night after night after night he found himself here, the unending checkerboard corridor.
He held his hands to his face and screamed. The sound wasn't right, it was muffled and bubbly, like shouting for help underwater. He stopped screaming.
His hands slid down his face and settled in his lap, his eyes looked at the pattern on the floor. All was stable for a few moments but then, in the general manner of dreams, things began to shift. The black squares became holes, the white ones became pillars, the walls and ceiling receded into the darkness that was now around him.
He perched on the edge of the pillar beneath him and gazed down. If he jumped, he'd wake up. He felt dizzy.
He closed his eyes and shook his head, conjuring the image of the corridor into his mind. When he opened his eyes again, he was back there, the monotonous channel of his inner self. Sure, he could travel anywhere, do anything, fuck anyone but this was important, this corridor was here in direct response to his mental imperative. He wanted to stay until he knew what the message was, if there even was one.
He rubbed the floor with a finger, the texture felt like glass. He lifted his hand and found a vicious sliver of glass was now clutched in his fist, blood dripping from the underside of his little finger. He gazed at it dispassionately, the pain felt in dreams a hollow and muted thing, more a sensation of pressure than sharpness. The blood began to pool on the tile next to him.
A hand rose through the thick liquid, piercing the air with its digits. It beckoned. Warren leaned closer. It held its palm up in a “Stop” gesture and then pointed around the narrow pool. Warren nodded. He moved the glass shard to his other arm and let it kiss the skin. He dragged the delicate tip of glass. Blood flowed. The pool widened. He dived in.

The time of death was recorded as 2:30am. The cause, after some careful examination and thought, was deemed to be self-mutilation by the sleeper, each wrist and forearm gouged and torn at with the fingers and nails of the opposite hand. The press release was delayed until the next day.

THE END


Monday, 14 September 2015

Dark Fiction - Grind

Grind

By Casey Douglass



It was the kind of morning that made his bones shake. The misty rain hung in the air reflecting the state of his mind: gloomy, with a chance of depression. It was still and quiet outside, until a lone bird began to sing its morning ditty, ruining his description of quietude. A bubble of frustration burst in his chest.
It was the kind of morning in which a better writer would sit and create worlds, mythologies and intricate plots, the kind that twist and tear their way through the reader's expectations. All he could do was sit and ruminate on the weather, which he noted was very British.
“Rain again!” the man yelled from across the street as he rushed along in his large stuffy coat.
“You know it friend!” another bellowed from the dry space provided by the bus stop.
But of course, it wouldn't go like that would it. This is Britain, a place that lost its lustre years ago, about the same time it lost its status of being the bully of the world. Now it was full of pale little people that walked around grumbling about everything.
That might be a bit harsh, it probably was, but he was master of this tale and so it stayed. Better to be harsh or wrong in what you write than not write anything at all.
“Fucking weather!”
“Shut it you moaning cunt!”
That's how it would go, no time for false pleasantries when you're late for the job you hate. You might have to stay late and miss the latest instalment of whichever asinine reality TV series you are watching.
He wondered if you could purge and bottle bile. Not the literal kind, he was sure that was possible. More the emotional kind. He certainly seemed to have plenty to spare this morning. He listened. The bird outside was gone now, or at the least, holding its tongue. Maybe it had realised that the tune it was singing might be worth something so was busy searching the web for a recording studio and a copyright lawyer.
The bus hissed to a shuddering halt at the stop, the doors flinging open and releasing the smell of wet clothes and vinegary chips. The shuffling hoard left the chewing gum graveyard that was the pavement and climbed on. They attempted to observe the usual bus passenger etiquette of sitting in the most inappropriate places, the tallest sandwiched into seats with no leg room, the most frail made to stand unsteadily in the aisle.
The doors snapped shut. The floor lurched forward as the bus gained speed forcing a few of the standees to white knuckle the hand rails. The sound of the engine filled the confined space, everything else was otherwise silent, save for the odd sniff or cough. Gloomy monks meditating on the day ahead but God seemed to be elsewhere, maybe on his or her own commute.
A sound of twisted auto-tuned birdsong flooded the bus, heads twisting and turning to try and zero in on the cause. A sheepish looking teenager lifted a smartphone from his pocket and set it to silent, mutters of “That fucking song gets on my tits!” and “Jesus Christ turn that off!” accompanying his movements.
The bus carried on. The passengers stared blankly. Britain embraced them as they and the bus vanished amongst the sprawl of pound shops and mega-banks, the garish billboards lining the road promising them untold delights if they just bought this particular phone or voted for this particular MP. It was all bollocks and they knew it, but who had the courage to acknowledge it? You could go mad thinking like that!
He sat back in his chair and pondered. He wondered if you could bottle misery. Then he smiled and realised that it really wasn't necessary, there are always Mondays.

THE END