Monday 31 July 2017

Dating Profile Cliches and How To Use Them If You Must

Dating Profile Cliches and How To Use Them If You Must

Written by Casey Douglass

I’ve had profiles on various dating websites for many years now. This is mainly due to wanting to have as many chances as possible to meet someone lovely that I might otherwise never meet. It is also due to chronic illness and an inability to socialise as much as I’d like. I’m average looking at best, have never had a relationship (I’m fussy), and have enough emotional baggage to sink a ship, but I know how to craft a dating profile and I do surprisingly well. By craft a profile, I don’t mean some kind of PR exercise to make me look good and brush all of my less desirable issues aside. I portray myself authentically, warts and all, often breaking many of the so called “ideal profile” rules along the way. I always try to portray my true self in any writing or interaction I might have with others. This doesn't always go smoothly and I've made some mistakes in the past, but I always try to be open and honest in an interesting way. With this in mind, I wanted to write a post about the many cliches I see on dating profiles, it’s just so unnecessary.

Oh my word. If I see another profile that says the person likes to “Live life to the full” or “Won’t write much as where is the mystery then?” I might just throw up. This is a potential platform for you to meet someone amazing and you are going to put that amount of effort into your profile? I’m sure if you’ve got the looks, you could probably write that you enjoy killing kittens and you’d still get inundated with messages, but for the more average amongst us... nah. We need to work a little harder.

Cliches just might have their uses, if used well, but for the most part, they are lazy and boring. For a start, they are too familiar. Remember when “You only live once” (YOLO) was at epidemic proportions on social media? Now if it’s used, I’d be surprised if most people even pay it a split second of attention. The same goes for “living life to the full” and “We can tell our friends we met in the pub” So commonplace, so dull.

If you must insist on using a cliché, make it interesting or funny. If you must say that you like living life to the full, and you happen to like food, make a quip along the lines of “I enjoy living life to the full, as does my tummy when a triple cheese pizza is nearby!” That’s an improvement in my book as it tells us something about you and gives readers a potential conversation starting topic.

Adding more information around the cliché adds juice to your profile, but you can go further and be controversial or outrageous too. You know how you aren't meant to be negative on your profile? Bollocks. If you support Arsenal and hate Tottenham, work that in. If you can be a bit grumpy or moody at times (just like everyone else), find a way to mention that too. It takes finesse to do it in a way that doesn't overly dwell on it, but for the scope of this short piece, I think you’ll understand what I mean. It’s all about character, yours to be precise. You want to do everything you can to present the fleshed out person you really are, not a bronzed statue that might look good but is sadly hollow inside.

I will be writing more about online dating in the near future as lately I’ve found that I have a lot to say on the subject for some reason. Thank you for reading and good luck with your online connection seeking.