Sunday 30 November 2014

Lack Friday


No, the title isn’t a typo, it’s deliberate. We are now at Sunday and the news is still full of people who just couldn’t rise above and see what a crock Black Friday is. This isn’t aimed at normal, regular people with their heads screwed on properly, this is aimed at the greedy fuckers who practically assault people just to get their hands on a piece of crap that will lose all meaning to them in a few months’ time.

This used to be a purely American thing, but now it is increasingly hyped up in the UK too. But of course, we must all bow at the altar of consumerism or where would society be? Keep the sheeple happy with shiny baubles and glossy gadgets and they won’t notice how shit everything else is.

All of the build-up, all of the hype is designed to create such a feeling of lack (ahah!) that some can’t seem to bare it and just slide back a few notches on the old evolutionary scale. Did they have Black Friday back in caveman times? 80% off a new animal cloak? Free spit-shampoo with every purchase? Maybe people were just too busy with the little old issue of survival.

Now Cyber Monday looms, the day where websites cream themselves trying to recreate the thrill of Black Friday but in a virtual form. You just end up trading physical blows and cold weather for artificial count-down timers and hitting the refresh button of your browser. That’s if the websites even stay up long enough under the load. Lab-rats pushing little buttons to make a treat slide into their cage come to mind.

If you are simply looking for something that you have wanted for awhile at a bargain price, I do wish you luck. If you are just being carried along by the capitalist myth of buying happiness, you deserve everything you get.